Navigating Migraines and Relationships | MyMigraineTeam

Connect with others who understand.

sign up Log in
Resources
About MyMigraineTeam
Powered By

Navigating Migraines and Relationships

Posted on September 12, 2019

If migraines are straining your relationship, you’re not alone. A study of 13,000 people with migraines found that the chronic condition can cause relationship problems, delays in getting married or starting a family, and much more.

Members of MyMigraineTeam acknowledge that the chronic physical and emotional pain associated with migraines has stressed their relationships. Many feel at fault, isolated, misunderstood, and worried about the future.

"Most of our fights are about my health. I love [my husband] and don't want to lose what we have, so how do I bridge the gap?” shared one member. Another said: “My husband never helped me, not even to check on me. If I was in bed all day, he wouldn't come near me.”

Migraines as a Third Wheel

Some relationships break up, divorce, or never get off the ground when migraines act as a “third wheel.” “[My husband] couldn't understand why I couldn't take care of him,” shared one member. “The headaches can't be that bad, [he’d say]. We are no longer together.”

In some cases, migraines are the tip of a bad-relationship iceberg. “My husband went from understanding to [being] annoyed that I couldn't go out, and irritated that I needed the house quiet. We're divorced now, but that was just a piece of the problem. Sometimes it’s easier to go it alone,” admitted one member.

Even single people with migraines wonder whether it’s worth entering a relationship. “My kids have really been on me to start dating,” said one woman six years after her divorce. “But my body hurts, I have very little energy, is it fair to even start a relationship with someone? I’m pretty happy alone, most of the time.”

Weathering the Migraine Storm

Relationships that survive migraines tend to be solid from the start. “When I met my present husband, I told him about my past. He understood about the migraines and supported me. We’ve been married 25 years, I still have migraines, and he still supports me,” said one member.

Making peace with migraines and marriage can take years of work. “My husband has come around in the last three to four years,” said one member who wrote about finding the balance between illness and support. “Migraines have really taken a toll on my life and health – and he finally sees that!”

Talking openly about migraines, when possible, helps partners and caregivers “get it.” “My husband and I have a hard time communicating. But we’ve learned to talk it out until we understand what the other is trying to relay,” shared one member.

Members advise others to “understand that it’s just as hard on them to watch you suffer.” One woman tells her husband to “go and enjoy things,” even if she can't. “I encouraged him to play in his band. I sent him to my nephew's wedding yesterday. Let your guy in as much as possible. It really can work!”

Setting Boundaries When You Have Migraines

Setting relationship boundaries is key to survival, especially when you deal with migraines. “I made a list of boundaries that help me [avoid] the toxicity of abusive or dramatic relationships with men, women, friends, or family - lines I won't cross because I can't afford to get sicker,” shared one woman. “Took me over 20 years to figure this out.”

One woman saved her marriage with a “migraine bedroom.” “It's a room I go to,” she wrote. “[My husband] will check in, just to make sure I’m still breathing!”

Sometimes, distance is the only thing that helps. “When I get away from my stressor [ex] husband and [current] boyfriend, the headaches go away,” reported one member.

Getting Support for Migraines

Members on MyMigraineTeam provide much-needed support to others juggling migraine pain, a difficult partner, or a relationship on the rocks.

“When we have health issues, it's important that our relationships remain as drama-free as possible,” advised one woman.

Another shared a bit of light-hearted advice with a distressed member: “I hope this makes you smile. My ex-husband was a big guy. I used to ask people, ‘Do you know how to get rid of 280 pounds of unwanted fat? Divorce him!’ LOL. Hope things get better for you. Hang in there!”

 

On MyMigraineTeam, the social network and online support group for those living with migraines, members talk about a range of personal experiences including relationship struggles.

 

Here are some conversations about migraines and relationships:
 

 
Have another topic you'd like to discuss or explore? Go to MyMigraineTeam today and start the conversation. You'll be surprised how many others share similar stories.

Posted on September 12, 2019
All updates must be accompanied by text or a picture.

Become a Subscriber

Get the latest articles about migraines sent to your inbox.

This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.

Related Articles

As someone living with chronic migraine headaches, you have likely searched for lifestyle modific...

Can Tinted Glasses Help Prevent or Ease Migraine? Rose-Tinted and More

As someone living with chronic migraine headaches, you have likely searched for lifestyle modific...
Medical professionals have long known that cold therapy can help migraine attacks — studies on th...

Migraine Cold Caps and Compression Hats: Can They Help?

Medical professionals have long known that cold therapy can help migraine attacks — studies on th...
Unlike regular headaches, migraine is a complex neurological condition, and scientists continue t...

5 Ways MyMigraineTeam Members Cope With Chronic Migraine

Unlike regular headaches, migraine is a complex neurological condition, and scientists continue t...
This is a short guided meditation by Dr. Christiane Wolf on self-kindness, which gives you more s...

Self-Kindness When Struggling: 6-Minute Guided Meditation

This is a short guided meditation by Dr. Christiane Wolf on self-kindness, which gives you more s...
Daith and tragus piercings are among the most talked about — and controversial — alternative ther...

Daith and Tragus Piercings for Migraine Pain: 6 Facts You Need To Know

Daith and tragus piercings are among the most talked about — and controversial — alternative ther...
Studies indicate that as many as 62 percent of people with migraine headaches downplay their symp...

Hiding Migraine Symptoms

Studies indicate that as many as 62 percent of people with migraine headaches downplay their symp...

Recent Articles

If you feel a migraine headache coming on, you probably take an over-the-counter pain reliever or...

How Does Migraine Infusion Therapy Work? 6 Things To Know

If you feel a migraine headache coming on, you probably take an over-the-counter pain reliever or...
Calcitonin gene-related peptides (CGRPs) are proteins that may contribute to migraine headache pa...

What Is CGRP and How Does It Affect Migraine?

Calcitonin gene-related peptides (CGRPs) are proteins that may contribute to migraine headache pa...
Recurring, chronic migraine attacks can be debilitating and affect your quality of life. One memb...

What Is Preventive Migraine Treatment? 5 Things To Know

Recurring, chronic migraine attacks can be debilitating and affect your quality of life. One memb...
When living with chronic migraine, more than half of your days every month are filled with throbb...

Chronic Migraine: 8 Common Treatments

When living with chronic migraine, more than half of your days every month are filled with throbb...
Welcome to MyMigraineTeam — the place to connect with others living with migraine. This video wi...

Getting Started on MyMigraineTeam (VIDEO)

Welcome to MyMigraineTeam — the place to connect with others living with migraine. This video wi...
If you’re looking for ways to reduce the fatigue that often accompanies migraine headaches, you’r...

Migraine and Fatigue: 6 Tips To Feel Better

If you’re looking for ways to reduce the fatigue that often accompanies migraine headaches, you’r...
MyMigraineTeam My migraines Team

Thank you for subscribing!

Become a member to get even more:

sign up for free

close